My kids and I have this ongoing conversation about who loves who more. 

The other night, as I’m saying goodnight to my daughter we’re having this conversation about who loves who more. I say it’s clear that I love you more because I don’t yell at you ALL OF THE TIME! She replies, “Oh no, Mom, you misunderstand me, yelling is my love language.” 

After I stopped laughing, I started to think about how easily we misinterpreted each other’s love languages. 

The 5 Love Languages that Gary Chapman shares in his book are: 

1. Physical Touch 

2. Acts of Service 

3. Quality Time

4. Words of Appreciation 

5. Gifts 

So often, we give to our partner what we want to receive, which often leaves people feeling unloved. 

But what if every time your spouse wants to have sex with you, you receive it as an act of love or every time they want to spend an afternoon with you talking over a cup of tea, you receive it as an act of love?

I’ve started translating my daughter's shouts as her telling me, in her very own 13 year old way, that she loves me. And it’s been transformational. 

Retake the love language quiz if you don’t know what yours are, and have your partner - and/or your kids! - do the same.

What to do if you have very different love languages? Watch this video to learn more. 

Happy love languaging!